Metro Moms

Through the eyes of a child

Don't you wish that you could see things through the eyes of a child again?  Things were so simple then and so very fun.  Have you ever noticed that the silliest things make them laugh?  Or how their eyes light up just at the idea of an ice-cream cone or how very funny they think the knock-knock joke is, even after hearing it at least 50 times?  How often I forget that I can still see life that way.  All I need to do sometimes is get down on their level and have fun with them. 

And it really is the simple things, the small ones, so much more than the big things.  Yes, the trips to Disney and vacations are great, but I think even they remember the little things even more.  The times we sit around and play with Emma and all laugh hysterically at the silly things she does or the times we just share stories about things that happened to us.  I think so many times I make having fun such a big deal that I forget to just play and laugh with my children.  Fun doesn't have to be planned, although it can be.  But a joyful heart and a desire to be engaged with and enjoy my children will create that atmosphere of fun in our home.  I want our home to be the place they most enjoy and if it isn't any fun, I don't think that will be the case.

I must continually remind myself that the laundry can wait and the house can be a little messy so I can make the most of those opportunities with my children.  I want to make those memories with them now and enjoy this special time.  I want them to always know how much I enjoy being with them and that they are more important to me than "getting things done."  So, please join me as I engage in the simple things with them and laugh and play.  I think I may even go and hide in the cabinet myself, so Emma can find me, instead of it being only Matthew and Hope. 

Time With My Boys

I had to stop and think on this one.  I spend LOTS of time with my kids.  I mean, they are with me pretty much all day, every day!  But what are the ways that I really have FUN with them?  Obviously, this was a good thing to consider...something that I need to work on cultivating on a daily basis.  However, there are a couple things that really stand out...

I really enjoy taking my kids to the park.  I know that isn't an original idea, but it is something that gets us out of our normal surroundings.  It is fun to push them on the swings and watch them "conquer" the imaginary "bad guys" on the play ground.  I really love to surprise them and stop by the park while we are out running errands.  It is a fun surprise for them - can't wait for the weather to cool off a bit...

Another thing that has been really fun for us, is to get in the jacuzzi!  This was especially fun during a season that my husband had to work late into the evening.  The boys and I would go get in the jacuzzi after dinner and eat popsicles!  (Can't do this one right now, though, as our jacuzzi is out of service! )

Finally, I really enjoy doing art projects with my kids.  We tend to do a lot of this during the fall/holidays.  They get excited and messy, but we have a lot of fun. 

So those would be some of my favorite ways to spend FUN TIME with my boys!

Posted by Stephanie

P.S. from Sheree:  Maybe Stephanie could post some fun art projects to do with young children during the upcoming holidays! 

More "Old" games for Kids from an "Old" Mom

I just couldn't resist following up on Debi's post from yesterday.  I loved it!  It brought back so many childhood memories of neighborhood games of tether ball, hide n seek, dodge ball and tag!  Those were the days when it was safe to play outside till dark with the neighborhood kids while Mom and Dad watched from a distance and chatted with the other parents.

When our children were young we needed to be more careful about neighborhood influences, so we had to wisely choose times of the day for them to have outside play.  This meant Mom had to play outdoors with them quite a bit, especially when the older ones were little and there weren't enough siblings to make teams yet!

Here are some more ideas for games to do with the kids...games many children today don't know how to play because of our entertainment saturated culture.  All these games can be played with just a child or two -- or lots!  We also played these games at our children's birthday parties and as the older ones got to be age 8 or so, they were put "in charge" of the games for parties for their younger siblings...or just to help entertain kids while a group of moms talked over coffee.  And all these games can be played indoors, too.

• Duck, duck goose:  How fun to watch little toddlers trying to navigate this one! 
• Freeze tag:  Remember this one?  Just like tag but you're "frozen" in place once you are tagged, until someone else touches you and unfreezes you.
• Kickball:  Recently I was with a group of children who had never played kick ball!  How sad.  At our house we also played this with a balloon indoors on rainy days.
• Hot potato:  Play this with your kids with a potato or any small object.  Keep a cd player nearby with fun, perky music; pass the object around and whoever ends up with it is "out."  Yes, it's a good opportunity to teach little ones to lose graciously. :-)
• Red light, green light:  One of my favorites!  If you don't remember this you can find the rules here.
• Mother May I?:  Another personal favorite.  This one is especially good because it teaches the importance of asking permission.  Use this game to talk about how children should obey their Mom and Dad and not do things without asking first.
• The Farmer and the Dell:  What fun memories I have of playing this with my children.  Again, if you need a refresher, you can find it here.  You can adjust the game for the number of children available.  After you play, you can have them color pictures about this game by accessing them here.
• London Bridge is Falling Down:  Pictures are flashing through my mind of family nights in the basement with Benny and me on our knees "taking the key and locking them up."  Here is the real rhyme, where you'll see nothing about locking anyone up!  You'll also read about the interesting story behind this childhood game. 

I'm all inspired!  I can't wait till the grandchildren are over next so I can make new memories of fun "old timey games" with a new generation! 

Posted by Sheree 

Cultivating Imagination

In this age of computer games, children's television and even Baby Einstein, I'm afraid that our children will miss an opportunity to play using nothing more than their imaginations, and a few common items. 

Something I LOVED doing with my children when they were young was teaching them games that I played when I was little.  My Mom excelled at helping my imagination grow by teaching me to play in a way that required my imagination; what fun it was to do the same with my own children.

Here are some examples:

• Make acorn soup or pine tree blossom stew.  (This was merely giving my child a bowl and taking them to the backyard to find acorns or pine tree blossoms, stir them with water and serve it to their imaginary friends.) 
• Playing tent in the family room.  (Take dining room or kitchen chairs and place them in a circle.  Cover them with old sheets using clothes pins to hold them in place and let your children play house.  I was even known to let them eat lunch or do school in their "fort".)
• Teach them to hunt doodlebugs, the biological name is "antlions".  Have you ever noticed outside in the Florida sand what looks like tiny sinkholes?  You'll usually find them next to the house or patio.  If you take your finger and swirl it around while digging down, you'll find what we always called doodlebugs - we called them that because we had to doodle our fingers to find them.  Interestingly, they build these sink holes to capture ants for lunch!
• Play Hopscotch with them. (The link teaches several variations of the game as well as the history - very interesting!)
• My personal favorite - play together in the rain and make mud pies. (Make sure it isn't lighting, of course!)
• Make paper dolls chains. (The old fashioned kind that are connected together at the arms.)
• Play jump rope with two turning the rope and one jumping. 
• Start a story and let your children take turns making up what happens next.

Many of these ideas came from a series of books my Mom purchased called Child Horizons.  My favorite book  was Things To Make And Do, by Esther M. Bjoland (1958).  Although out-of-print, it is still available from private sellers.  This would be a worthwhile investment for help in cultivating the art of being a child and giving great ideas on how to make the time spent playing with them memorable and free.  Who knows, maybe they'll invest time in teaching their children the same games you taught them.

Posted by Debi 

Fun Things to do with TIME with Children

We're continuing our series on a biblical perspective on time with some fun and meaningful ways to spend time with our children.  We hope these ideas will serve you...or spark fun ideas of your own.  Please post any ideas that your children particularly enjoy, or fun family traditions others might want to use, too!

WHEN IS THE LAST TIME I...

Had a pajama day with my kids?

Sat on the floor to put together a puzzle?

Painted my daughter's fingernails?

Read a huge stack of books on the couch?

Encouraged my kids when they had a good response?

Let them make a mess in the kitchen helping me with dinner?

Had a tea party? With goldfish and milk?

Looked up an answer to a question instead of just saying "I don't know"?

Sat in bed telling and listening to stories with my kids?

Talked about what God was doing in their hearts?

Made chocolate chip pancakes?

Planned a special surprise with them for their daddy?

Said "Yes" when they asked me to play with them?

There many many opportunities every single day for me to spend precious time with my kids.  To train and nurture them. To love on them. To laugh and make memories with them.  The laundry can wait, my email can wait, I have a lunch date with three amazing little ones!

Posted by Taraleigh

What Will My Children Remember?

Recently the Lord has been showing me a glimpse of my heart.  Over the past couple of months in particular, I have found my responses to my children to be harsh and irritable.  In my mind I was justifying it because I was exhausted (after all, both boys were up several times last night and that was the 5th night in a row!) 

The Lord began to prick my heart.  However, I am not sure how much I have listened.  I think at times I have made adjustments, but after this study on the Brevity of Life I am convicted once again.  My irritation and harshness toward my children is rooted in anger that resides in my heart.  I am not sure that the anger is always directed toward them (sometimes it is) but one way or the other, they are receiving the effects (manifestations) of anger in my heart.

I need the Lord's help to change in this area.  I can't do it on my own.  The good news is that the Lord has promised to give me the grace for what He has called me to do!  He has called me to be a loving, patient mom that is full of grace toward her children.  That is how I want my children to remember me.  I need HIS grace and strength to change!

Lord, thank you for being so kind to reveal my heart.  I desire to be a faithful mom - one that communicates love, not irritation.  Please help me in my attitude toward my children.  Give me the grace I need for each day, no matter how much sleep I got the night before.  I want to glorify You in the limited time I have with my children.  I need your help!

Posted by Stephanie

Running To the Cross

There were so many good questions and thoughts to mull over this past week!  It really is hard to narrow down what the Lord has been saying and convicting me of during this time.  I will share one area that has come up on more then one occasion.  The question, "Do I allow the demands of motherhood to rob me of the sheer joy and fun of having children?" struck a chord more than once.  The answer is yes.  Right now it is on a daily basis.  What the Lord has been revealing to me is that I have been walking around with a guilty conscience.  I realize that I am sinning and try to change on my own, but I'm unwilling to repent to God and my children. 

Last week you should have seen me, it was so sad.  I think my children were scared of even asking me for a drink because I was so easily irritated.  I became angry very quickly over the smallest of offenses.  But in my pride I kept going, becoming frustrated when I failed, and becoming even more prideful thinking ~ "I should not be struggling with this, I am sooo past this!"

What I was reminded of in reading last week's posts was that my time is way too short with my children to be spent like this!!!  I spent some time that morning confessing my sin to God and then sat down with Jacob and Brianna and asked their forgiveness for becoming angry quickly and not being loving and patient with them.  That day I experienced the sweet forgiveness of my Savior and my children.  I want to learn from my children who are so quick to forgive. I also experienced the freedom of a clear conscience. Ah, I love it!

Lord, thank you that your kindness leads me to repentance.  Thank you for the means of grace in my life that point me back to the Cross. Lord thank you for the Savior's blood that washes me clean.  I pray that I would be quick to run to you for forgiveness.  I pray that all of the moms reading this would experience your grace in their life, that we would continue to humble ourselves before you and grow in godliness.  Lord I truly thank you for every moment that I have with my children. I am freshly aware of the gift they are to me and I am eternally grateful for the precious time you have given me to love, nurture, and train them. In Jesus' Holy Name, Amen.

Posted by Taraleigh

Taking Time to Listen

One of the fruits of the Spirit listed in Galatians chapter five verse twenty-two is patience.  The Lord recently convicted me of my lack of patience when it comes to taking the time to listen to my six-year old.  The fruit that was being produced in his life as a result was anxiousness and a very hurried manner of communicating verbally.  It was as if he was trying to fit a lifetime of conversations into one discussion.  This revelation has opened my eyes to see the importance of not just taking the time to train him, but also taking the time to enjoy simple conversations with him.  It's amazing to me how effective the act of taking the time to patiently listen to him is helping him to communicate with me in a calm and unhurried manner.  He has a lot going on in that six-year old mind and is quite fun to listen to at times.  It also gives me an opportunity to understand how he is processing all the training we are doing and to see if there are any gaps in his understanding.

I spend much of my day talking "at" him by virtue of my God-given role as his mom, but God is helping me to freshly see that it's also important to patiently listen.  I've lately enjoyed listening to his child-like, faith-filled prayers, his crazy stories, and his non-sensical jokes.  Even though he's a child, I need to remember that communication in a relationship is two-sided...talking and listening =) !

Posted by Michelle

If I Had It To Do All Over Again

The truths taught the past two weeks here on the Metro Moms blog have been so beneficial for all moms to remember, but especially those who still have children at home. This week you will hear from real Moms who, as a result of Sheree's insightful and challenging posts, are allowing God to challenge how they view and spend their time. 

To recap, the question was posed:
What does a biblical perspective on numbering our days do for us?  Sheree offered 6 points from Psalm 90:

1. A biblical perspective on the brevity of life protects us from self-effort
2. It prevents us from the deception of a "time wasters" mentality
3. Provides grace-motivated desire to deal with our sins against our children
4. We can experience ongoing joy and gladness
5. It helps us to long for the spiritual hunger of our children
6. It protects us from self-sufficiency by reminding us that God alone can sustain our efforts

I must admit that looking back over the past 25 years of raising children, I wish I had cultivated the truths of Psalm 90 in my life.  I would say that the two most convicting points for me in raising small children would have been #2 and #4.  I have often been selfish with my time, especially being a home-schooling mom.  I felt that I had already given my children so much of my time, that when school was over it was time for ME.  Sadly, I didn't realize how much of my time I wasted pursuing selfish desires rather than really devoting all my time to my children. 

Secondly, I often lacked an enjoyment of my children that I saw other mothers revel in.  I would see different moms on their hands and knees engaging their children on their level with a smile that was infectious. But I was regularly too busy to notice my children, or too preoccupied with what they weren't doing right to take pleasure in who God had made them to be.

By God's grace, my children do not recall many of my mistakes - that is truly God's mercy and kindness to them and to me.  But, if I had it to do all over again, I hope that I would be like Mary and choose the good part.

Posted by Debi

 

God Alone Can Sustain our Efforts

Today we take a look at the sixth and final benefit of a biblical perspective on the brevity of life from Psalm 90 with this:  it protects us from self-sufficiency by reminding us that God alone can sustain our efforts.

This wonderful Psalm ends with this humble cry, "May the favor of the Lord our God be upon us; establish the work of our hands for us; yes, establish the work of our hands."

Motherhood is hard work.  And the self-sufficient mother puts the accent on her efforts as the key to her children's growth in godliness.  "If I am faithful to discipline...consistent in church involvement...responsible to protect from worldly influences...wise in who I allow them to have as friends...faithful to deal with heart issues and not just external behavior...etc...etc...then my children will grow up to be fruitful and godly young adults."  It's true that the wise parent will do these (and other) "if" statements because they understand that responsible parenting matters.  The problem with this perspective is the "then" statement.  The parent who thinks like this is assuming their efforts will guarantee the desired results. Their faithfulness is the key.  Their consistency will lead to good fruit.

Moses learned something really important in his long life -- that God's sustaining help and power were much more important than his efforts.  Do you hear the yearning in his voice?  This old man had accomplished a lot in his lifetime.  His life was one epic event after another!  Yet here he is at the end of his life saying:  "Oh God, please sustain what I have worked hard with Your help to do.  I've attempted to do what You called me to do, but what really matters is Your blessing and favor.  Please don't allow my efforts to end with my death.  If you don't establish my work, it will fade and future generations will never benefit from all that You've accomplished.  Please cause all that has been done to last."

Moms, if we understand the brevity of our lives we will join Moses in crying out similar words to God.  Without God's favor and help, our efforts mean little.  Yes, what we do matters because God has commanded us to raise our children in the nurture and instruction of the Lord. But there is only One who can change their hearts.  Only One who can take a heart that is bent on sin and turn it into a heart that wants to do good.  Only One who can bless and sustain our efforts.  And that One is our Lord Jesus -- the One who gave us children to raise to love, glorify and worship Him!

Moms, let's stop and cry out to God as Moses did:  May the favor of the Lord our God be upon us; establish the work of our hands for us; yes, establish the work of our hands!!!

Lord, please forgive me for trusting in my efforts more than in Your power!  I need Your favor.  I need Your help.  I can't be a godly mother without Your sustaining grace in my life every day!  Please help me to resist self-sufficiency and to depend on You to give me the wisdom, grace and power to mother my children in a way that pleases and honors You.  Lord, I'm weak.  I'm needy.  But because of the Cross I can have faith in Your ability to establish the work of my hands.  I trust You, Lord, to do that which only You can do in my children's hearts and lives.  Thank you for reminding me that life is short and my strength and wisdom have narrow limits.  But Your power and wisdom and grace are without limits!  You will complete the work You've begun in me...and in my children.  Thank you, Lord!

Posted by Sheree